“And at the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, ‘Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?’ which is translated, ‘My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?’”  Mk. 15:34

Teresa De Avila, the great mystic saint of the middle ages, is reported to have once cried out to heaven, “God, no wonder You have so few friends, look how You treat them!” Personally I find that kind of spiritual honesty very refreshing as well as encouraging. We do a grave disservice to the people around us if we hide the fact that at times we struggle with God. Sometimes, very intensely. If we’re living in the same fallen world everyone else is, then there will be times in all of our lives that the words that best describe our relationship with God are: Abandoned…Confused…Hurt…Second Guessing The Whole Thing…Depressed…Angry…Bone Weary…Ready To Throw In The Towel…etc. Sometimes those feelings are the result of sin in our lives. More often than I think we realize, they are simply clear evidences of our humanity. Just like our Lord.

I’m totally intrigued with this passage. At one level this is terrible marketing on the part of our Lord. He has just spent the last three and a half years telling people how close He and the Father are. So close in fact, that they are one. (Jn.10:30). Now, at the very end, one would think He would keep His doubts under close wrap. At most, He might whisper His feelings of betrayal. But what does the text say? “…Jesus cried out with a loud voice…”. Eugene Peterson renders it well, “Jesus groaned out of the depths, crying loudly” (The Message). Careful Jesus, someone might hear You.

Maybe Jesus wanted people to hear. Maybe He wanted us to know that struggle is part and parcel of walking closely with God. Was His cry the result of sin? Clearly, unquestionably not. It was the passionate expression of unbridled humanity. He is doing far more than simply quoting Ps. 22:1 on the cross. He is giving full vent to the excruciating reality of being separated from the Father’s presence for the first and only time in all eternity. An agony you and I cannot even begin to imagine. But an agony that He was unwilling to repress and pretend that it didn’t exist. And I, for one, am so glad that He didn’t. It reminds me that there is nothing spiritual about stiff arming our humanity and pretending that we don’t hurt as badly as we hurt or that we aren’t confused as badly as we are confused. And honest admission of our struggles does not put unbelievers off. In fact, you’ll note that just four verses later the Roman Centurion declares, “Truly this Man was the Son of God!” (Mk. 15:38). Honest, ruthlessly honest spirituality is the need of the hour. Always has been, always will be. God bless you my fellow strugglers.